WTF... I'm NOT Metrosexual

I am 14% Metrosexual.
Metro-What? Git Off My Lawn!
I need some advice. I need to STOP BUYING MY CLOTHS AT WAL-MART!!!! I will never land a decent woman unless I shave this nasty facial hair, and spend more then $5 on a haircut.

NOTE: it was a $10 hair cut :-P, but $5 clothes

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